i have to admit, it’s getting better

And I know at least one person (Scott) who will be surprised to hear me say that, since last night was our most colossal crying fit EVER, and for the first time since we brought him home, Jonah did not go to sleep at midnight but rather at 3 a.m. or so — in the car seat, which Scott retrieved from the car when we hit the “we’ll try anything” point.

We’re pretty sure Jonah is crying from some kind of intestinal distress, he’s been hiccuping, spitting up, gassy, screaming while his bowels growl, and sleeping at an upright angle was one solution we’d read about.

Just feeding him when he cries is not really working anymore so now we’re trying more soothing. I’m trusting our post partum doula (and my own intuition which similarly whispered to me) who suggested that feeding him when he has gas is not really a solution.

And so, today, we don’t let him “cry it out” per se, but we are trying more bouncing, rocking, swaddling, singing, shooshing, jiggling, mobying walking, and thus feeding less excessively. Although we’re still kind of trying to figure out what the right amount is. The pediatrician suggested 10-20 minutes (per boob? can’t remember) every two hours during the day with longer breaks between at night. As opposed to the 1 to 1-1/2 hour long feeds plus he’s currently been enjoying.

And I’ll be changing my diet to avoid gas producing foods (I never really do enjoy broccoli anyway).

And we’re administering “Gripe Water” per the ped’s suggestion.

And trying to believe that we’re doing the right thing.

It’s the having faith in ourselves that is the hard part. When the faith wavers, the crying seems so much louder.

Right now, Scott is singing to the swaddled boy while bouncing on the ball, and the shrieking has suddenly subsided.

Maybe later tonight, we’ll even get some sleep?

In other news, he’s three weeks old today and definitely seems to be noticing us more, and has longer periods during the day where he is awake and just content to hang out with us. We like that.

9 comments for “i have to admit, it’s getting better

  1. December 17, 2007 at 9:56 pm

    Yay! This all sounds very sensible. I recall some doctor or nursing expert saying that the boob empties after twenty minutes anyway…

    It does seem that if he’s in pain he is not going to feel like socializing or noticing or relating much – I don’t when I feel bad. So maybe now that it’s easing up a little, he has more energy to notice you.

    My eldest went through a phase at about 3 – 4 weeks where he would only sleep in the bouncy seat, semi-upright, at about 3 am. Whatever works. This phase passed.

    But I know it’s trying while it lasts. You’re doing a great job just hanging in there and coping.

    Love to you all!

  2. December 18, 2007 at 6:41 am

    I love babies. But I have to say that I think nature got the balance a bit wrong. Babies are the hardest work when they are the least rewarding. As soon as they start to smile and give more back it is so much easier. Newborns are gorgeous of course but they do a lot of taking!
    What you are doing sounds very sensible to me.

  3. December 18, 2007 at 6:53 am

    Trust yourself. And if you can’t then read Dr. Spock’s book and he will tell you to trust yourself. You are doing everything right. Babies are like computers…you can’t hurt them unless you spill coffee on them. You are doing great!

    Sleeping in the car seat IS THE WAY TO GO. At least it was for all three of my children. It is at a slight angle. They feel all snuggly in there with the ever slight “walls” and it is narrow so the space is just perfect for them. All of this equals cozy.

    Hang in there.

  4. December 18, 2007 at 8:39 am

    I’m so glad! hope this continues!

  5. December 18, 2007 at 9:46 am

    20 minutes per side is about all he needs. If he keeps nursing after 40 minutes, sounds like he may be comfort sucking — our son did this too, but without the nasty spitting up, etc. you’re experiencing — so we let him do it until we figured out he wasn’t really eating.

    I’m postulating here: since he equates nursing with comfort, he just keeps going, hoping milk will make everything better. Then it becomes a vicious cycle of too much milk, stomach upset, gas, and all the rest.

    Sleeping in the car seat is one option. Another is a wedge-shaped pillow so he can sleep with his head and upper body elevated. We used one of these and it worked great. Some people introduce a pacifier at this point. Like everything else in the world of babies, it’s controversial. Once breastfeeding is established, it can be a great source of comfort for a baby, and you can rest your nipples a bit. Other people say a pacifier can create confusion about what is mom and what isn’t.

    Have you tried a bit of formula to see if that helps?

    This all sounds stressful and unpleasant. I hope it abates soon.

  6. December 18, 2007 at 11:21 am

    I gotta tell you it sounds like GERD. (Gastroesophigealhoweveryouspellit Reflux.)

    2 mils of Mylanta fifteen minutes before eating. Alter your diet to exclude acids rather than gas-producing foods. So broccoli is fine, but tomatoes, vinegars, onions, wine, etc. are out. Give it a shot.

    Mare slept in the bucket for the first six months. She liked it, so it was what we did. We found it fit nicely in the bassinet. :)

    Glad it’s getting better. It’s nice when they start to notice you. You know, after all you’re doing for them it’s good that they at least acknowledge you.

  7. December 18, 2007 at 12:31 pm

    Oh yes! We are using the pacifier. He seems to have no problem with that vs. boob.

    I kinda love putting him in the carseat, in the cosleeper, next to me. He’s all snuggled in with his “snuzzler” and blankets and I think he likes that better than being surrounded by nothing in the big savanna of the bassinet.

    GERD? Gulp! I’ll try the no acid diet and see if that helps.

    The gripe water seems to be working.

  8. Tesha
    December 19, 2007 at 8:05 am

    I can’t give you any advice as I am not yet a mommy, but both my husband and I are cheering from the sidelines for you!

  9. December 19, 2007 at 4:32 pm

    Car seat in the bassinet, huh? I think he is just feeling disorganized out of the womb. All that snuggling, walking, humming helps him feel remember being upside down inside mommy’s belly, totally enclosed, with gurgles and talking and walking keeping him entertained.

    He’ll settle down. Glad you’re finding ways to keep him happy while his nervous system adjusts to the exterior world.

    Glad to know you’re hanging in there! Kisses to all… My kids are talking about Jonah and want to know when they can see him. I figure after Christmas or the new year even… whenever YOU feel up to it natch.

    Leila’s last blog post..Aziz Shihab, Arab-American Journalist

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