Comments on: sleep, the conclusion? http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/ Wed, 01 Sep 2010 02:19:12 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: NoMasNinos http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1367 NoMasNinos Fri, 04 Jul 2008 08:29:25 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1367 Don't you feel like you are sometimes going in circles? You try one thing, then try another, and before you know it, you are right back where you started, trying that Again. If nothing else, I've learned never to say never. You do what works for you and your child, because each child and mother relationship is SOOOOOO different - somthing that really sets in with the second. Some days it's just about survival. We've all done things we never thought we'd do, and that's okay. You are learning to be a mom to Jonah, and he is learning to be the son of a fantastic mother. <em>NoMasNinos's last blog post..<a href='http://nomasninos.blogspot.com/2008/07/mixed-emotions.html' rel="nofollow">Mixed Emotions</a></em> Don’t you feel like you are sometimes going in circles? You try one thing, then try another, and before you know it, you are right back where you started, trying that Again.

If nothing else, I’ve learned never to say never.

You do what works for you and your child, because each child and mother relationship is SOOOOOO different – somthing that really sets in with the second. Some days it’s just about survival.

We’ve all done things we never thought we’d do, and that’s okay. You are learning to be a mom to Jonah, and he is learning to be the son of a fantastic mother.

NoMasNinos’s last blog post..Mixed Emotions

]]> By: Leila Abu-Saba http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1363 Leila Abu-Saba Fri, 04 Jul 2008 02:04:20 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1363 I wrestled with my own ideas and expectations about how perfectly I was going to do attachment parenting and how he would be so fabulously attended to that he would always smile. Then he was born and wouldn't/couldn't nurse and in the ensuing lactation consultant/breast pump/feeding tubes-taped-to-nipples hell, I stopped trying so hard with everything else and just tried to make breastfeeding work. It didn't really, although he ended up nursing AND drinking gallons of formula every day until I was 3 months pregnant with 2d child. We went through it with sleeping, carrying him around (he got so big that wearing him became impossible after 5 months anyway) and more. First child did eventually sleep in the crib, when he slept, while second child stayed in our bed until he was nearly two. Oh yes and I always swore I would *NEVER* drive any kid of mine around in the car to get him to sleep, the way my parents drove me around. The environment and global warming. After six months of sleeptime traumas, we spent two years driving those babies around. My ideas of what I *should* be doing made me more unhappy than anything I actually did or did not do. I still regret the driving but it's done. You're doing fine... hope you enjoy what you have the power to do and let go of what you think you *ought* to do... I wrestled with my own ideas and expectations about how perfectly I was going to do attachment parenting and how he would be so fabulously attended to that he would always smile. Then he was born and wouldn’t/couldn’t nurse and in the ensuing lactation consultant/breast pump/feeding tubes-taped-to-nipples hell, I stopped trying so hard with everything else and just tried to make breastfeeding work. It didn’t really, although he ended up nursing AND drinking gallons of formula every day until I was 3 months pregnant with 2d child.

We went through it with sleeping, carrying him around (he got so big that wearing him became impossible after 5 months anyway) and more.

First child did eventually sleep in the crib, when he slept, while second child stayed in our bed until he was nearly two. Oh yes and I always swore I would *NEVER* drive any kid of mine around in the car to get him to sleep, the way my parents drove me around. The environment and global warming. After six months of sleeptime traumas, we spent two years driving those babies around.

My ideas of what I *should* be doing made me more unhappy than anything I actually did or did not do.

I still regret the driving but it’s done.

You’re doing fine… hope you enjoy what you have the power to do and let go of what you think you *ought* to do…

]]> By: liz http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1362 liz Thu, 03 Jul 2008 22:38:45 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1362 we are all imperfect. and i also do not have the stamina to be a full time crunchy attachment parenting parent. seriously, who has that kind of time? <em>liz's last blog post..<a href='http://hilaritiesensue.com/blog2/?p=509' rel="nofollow">and baby makes…a family.</a></em> we are all imperfect.

and i also do not have the stamina to be a full time crunchy attachment parenting parent. seriously, who has that kind of time?

liz’s last blog post..and baby makes…a family.

]]> By: Laura http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1360 Laura Thu, 03 Jul 2008 16:40:12 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1360 I've forgotten to take my vitamins for, oh, the last two months.... More congratulations on experimenting with techniques until you found what best suited Jonah and yourself. Certainly sounds like he is now getting the rest he needs. I've been having similar struggles with books about feeding - they say at seven and a half months I shouldn't be feeding Flanny strained foods anymore, that I should be feeding him mashed/lumpy table foods. Which he clearly doesn't yet understand. Sometimes I feel that families do best when we just put away the books altogether. Congratulations! <em>Laura's last blog post..<a href='http://ilpiccolino.blogspot.com/2008/07/group.html' rel="nofollow">The group</a></em> I’ve forgotten to take my vitamins for, oh, the last two months….

More congratulations on experimenting with techniques until you found what best suited Jonah and yourself. Certainly sounds like he is now getting the rest he needs.

I’ve been having similar struggles with books about feeding – they say at seven and a half months I shouldn’t be feeding Flanny strained foods anymore, that I should be feeding him mashed/lumpy table foods. Which he clearly doesn’t yet understand. Sometimes I feel that families do best when we just put away the books altogether.

Congratulations!

Laura’s last blog post..The group

]]> By: Farm Girl http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1359 Farm Girl Thu, 03 Jul 2008 15:27:37 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1359 I just wanted to say...GOOD FOR YOU! What ever works for you is the best for you and your little one. Everyone is going to tell your there way is the right way but everyone has different kids. Each one of mine 6, 3 and 4 m (all boys) has been totally different than the next. You just have to roll with it. You haven't damaged him, it is all a learning curve. The next one you will do better just because you can say been there done that. FYI...Mine slept in our room until 3 to 4 weeks then moved to there own rooms. My first slept through the night at 2 months the next at 5 months and the last at 8 weeks. Something different has worked for each one. I will say though that I wish I was the mom to my two that I am for my third. I tried to do the same things for the second that I did for the first and it didn't work they are totally different. The last we just go with it and it works. I do believe in scheduling it makes it easy to know what your baby needs and when he needs it. Nothing is better than experience. I made so many mistakes with them, but they seem to be normal for boys :) Sorry didn't mean for this to be so long! Good luck and keep up the good work. I just wanted to say…GOOD FOR YOU! What ever works for you is the best for you and your little one. Everyone is going to tell your there way is the right way but everyone has different kids. Each one of mine 6, 3 and 4 m (all boys) has been totally different than the next. You just have to roll with it. You haven’t damaged him, it is all a learning curve. The next one you will do better just because you can say been there done that.

FYI…Mine slept in our room until 3 to 4 weeks then moved to there own rooms. My first slept through the night at 2 months the next at 5 months and the last at 8 weeks. Something different has worked for each one. I will say though that I wish I was the mom to my two that I am for my third. I tried to do the same things for the second that I did for the first and it didn’t work they are totally different. The last we just go with it and it works. I do believe in scheduling it makes it easy to know what your baby needs and when he needs it. Nothing is better than experience. I made so many mistakes with them, but they seem to be normal for boys :)

Sorry didn’t mean for this to be so long!

Good luck and keep up the good work.

]]> By: Becky http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1358 Becky Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:55:19 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1358 Thanks for sharing this post with us! The other day I had to drop off my nephew with another care provider and when he started crying it actually brought me to tears (once I was in the car & he couldn't see me). It must be SO hard to listen to that crying, but yet gratifying to know that you're really doing the very best thing possible for your family. I'm going to have to bookmark this post in my "once we have kids" file. :) Becky http://www.stinkylemsky.typepad.com/ Thanks for sharing this post with us! The other day I had to drop off my nephew with another care provider and when he started crying it actually brought me to tears (once I was in the car & he couldn’t see me). It must be SO hard to listen to that crying, but yet gratifying to know that you’re really doing the very best thing possible for your family.

I’m going to have to bookmark this post in my “once we have kids” file.
:) Becky
http://www.stinkylemsky.typepad.com/

]]> By: Kate http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1357 Kate Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:25:21 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1357 I think you've realized the great truth--that you have to do what's right for you, your family, your baby. Your choices may not be right for someone else, but theirs might not be right for you. You seem to have done a wonderful job of informing yourself on a variety of methods and then using that information to determine what works for YOU. There are lots of different means of being the "perfect" mom. In all honesty, nothing gets me more steamed than those folks who do believe that their way is the only way and aren't willing to even consider that other people have different needs, ideas, or expectations. I don't think most moms ever stop worrying that they're doing the right things for their kids. To me, just that worry, just that DESIRE to do the right thing means that you are a good mom, just trying to do your best each day. <em>Kate's last blog post..<a href='http://willfull.blogspot.com/2008/07/hilarities-ensue.html' rel="nofollow">Hilarities Ensue</a></em> I think you’ve realized the great truth–that you have to do what’s right for you, your family, your baby. Your choices may not be right for someone else, but theirs might not be right for you. You seem to have done a wonderful job of informing yourself on a variety of methods and then using that information to determine what works for YOU. There are lots of different means of being the “perfect” mom. In all honesty, nothing gets me more steamed than those folks who do believe that their way is the only way and aren’t willing to even consider that other people have different needs, ideas, or expectations.
I don’t think most moms ever stop worrying that they’re doing the right things for their kids. To me, just that worry, just that DESIRE to do the right thing means that you are a good mom, just trying to do your best each day.

Kate’s last blog post..Hilarities Ensue

]]> By: Grandpa http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1356 Grandpa Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:15:15 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1356 You are the best most caring mom I have ever seen! You and Scott have done an amazing job and are raising an amazing child! And your writing this blog is so brave and honest! Give yourself a big hug, your imperfections are the most perfect attributes and the whole world should be as caring and loving as you! You are the best most caring mom I have ever seen! You and Scott have done an amazing job and are raising an amazing child! And your writing this blog is so brave and honest! Give yourself a big hug, your imperfections are the most perfect attributes and the whole world should be as caring and loving as you!

]]> By: Heather http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/comment-page-1/#comment-1355 Heather Thu, 03 Jul 2008 13:42:41 +0000 http://thecalmbeforethestork.com/2008/07/02/sleep-the-conclusion/#comment-1355 I'm with you on the doing what works for your child. I was actually against co-sleeping before Zack was born but I found at about 12 weeks that he slept better and longer with me because he was sick. So we did it for about 6 weeks and then it became apparent that it was no longer working and back to his crib he went. I also HATE to hear him cry, like when we took his binkie away, but now our life is so much easier because we don't have to freak out if we don't have one and he knows how to sooth himself without it. I’m with you on the doing what works for your child. I was actually against co-sleeping before Zack was born but I found at about 12 weeks that he slept better and longer with me because he was sick. So we did it for about 6 weeks and then it became apparent that it was no longer working and back to his crib he went.

I also HATE to hear him cry, like when we took his binkie away, but now our life is so much easier because we don’t have to freak out if we don’t have one and he knows how to sooth himself without it.

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